Skins Creep Me Out Man
by noisemaker
Summary: Response to ElleThom's challange fic. What if Scully walked in on Mulder and his video collection?


**Skins Creep Me Out Man  
**Notes: Challenge fic set forward by ElleThom. I own nothing and nobody. But enjoy!

X-Files Challenge hosted by ElleThom  
What if Scully walked in on Mulder in the midst of….well a little self love?  
1: Must involve Diana Fowley, oh you know this IS a challenge. LOL  
2: Should also involve one of their previous cases, any one you pick but has to be referenced in the fic  
3: I would also need a bear rug in it somewhere.

A vacation. That's what I needed. Thank god I finally have the ability to get away. Ten years stuck in a basement will drive a man insane. I haven't felt this much relief since I ended that crappy relationship with Diana Fowley. Talk about a relationship from hell. Those must have been my masochist years, I swear. Just the thought of that woman has turned me off from various sexual escapades instantaneously.

So now it's just me, alone in a lodge in the middle of nowhere. Scully took her vacation time to spend it with her family. So instead of spending a week with her, I'm here in a hunting lodge in the middle West Virginia surrounded by dead animals. The moose head on the wall is staring at me and really starting to creep me out. Although this bear skin rug on the floor is mighty comfortable, as long as I don't look at the head. Thank god Langley has as ample of a video collection as I do.

So in goes "Red Hot Police" into the VCR and I spread out across the bear rug. Ooh look, a short one, god she reminds me of Scully. Now that's a topic I could think about forever. Those suits, might not be the most flattering thing in the world, but damn watch her run in them and they cling to all the right places. Now that's a thought that certainly gets things… going. And with the show on TV, this is going to be one short night.

Not that I normally do this, but after ten years of sexual tension, coupled with the gorgeous redhead on TV, and more importantly the sexy one in my head I can't but help having to relieve myself. This is going to be quick, I can sense it already. Ooh, the bear skin is quite soft, I hadn't realized it until now. Just a few more minutes and I will be in pure heaven, well a self made heaven at least.

Oh shit, is that the door? No one knows I'm up here. I must be imagining things, back to my original enjoyment. Hrmmm, what I wouldn't give to have Scully here right now. Sssssccccuuuuullllllyyyyyy. Oh god, this is going to be shorter than I thought. Okay, now I'm totally not imagining things, someone just coughed behind me. I don't think I really want to turn around to see who it is. In fact, I know I don't. There is only one person who it could possibly be, and this is not the position I want her to find me in.

"Well, Mulder," the voice starts, laughing slightly. "This isn't the way I would picture you spending your vacation time. Although I'm not surprised."

I'm sitting here two minutes away from sheer ecstasy, and all she can do is make a joke. The least she could do is help me out, especially since I just moaned her name. Shit, she was standing right there when I did it too. "Uhm… welll… you see."

"So is that rug as soft as it looks," she says kneeling down next to me. "Why don't you turn that movie off."

I look at her shocked. I mean totally and completely speechless. This is my dream come true. No it can't be, it has to be a joke. But I'll get blue balls from her any day. Hell I do twice a week already. I slowly clamber to my knees to hit the power on the TV and when I turn around Scully has already laid down on the bear rug. "You know what this reminds me of, Mulder?" she asks innocently. I shake my head no in response. "Remember that case we were on, dancing to Cher?" By this point I'm hanging on here every word. I was just imagining what I would do if her were here, enjoying it I might add, and she's talking about past cases. "The truth is, I had to go home and do the same thing," she finished with a smirk.

FIN


End file.
